Separating turns one household into two. The income that ran one home now has to run two, and decisions about the house, pensions and savings last for decades after the paperwork is signed.
Gather the full picture
In a divorce or dissolution both of you must disclose your finances in full before any agreement is binding. Start the list early, because some of it takes weeks to arrive:
- the house: its value, the mortgage left and whose names are on both
- savings and ISAs in each name and in joint names
- every pension, with its transfer value (a cash equivalent transfer value, or CETV), which the provider must give you on request — some take six to eight weeks
- debts, including credit cards and loans in one name
- any business, and its value
What the court looks at
In England and Wales, a financial remedy court doesn't start from a 50/50 split. It aims for a fair outcome based on needs first, weighing each person's income and earning capacity, the standard of living during the marriage, your ages, how long you were married, and what each of you contributed, including time spent raising children or running the home rather than earning. In Scotland, the starting point is different in law: the Family Law (Scotland) Act 1985 generally shares the net value of “matrimonial property” — broadly, what you built up between the date of marriage and the date you stopped living together — fairly between you, usually close to equally, with scope to adjust for need. Either way, check which test applies to you before you negotiate.
Pensions
Worked example. Say one partner built up a workplace pension worth £180,000 over a 20-year marriage, and the other has £20,000. A pension sharing order could move a percentage of the larger pension into a new pension in the other partner's own name — for example 40% of the £180,000, around £72,000 — rather than trying to balance things by giving one person the house and the other almost nothing from the pensions. A court can make this order for a married couple or civil partners. Couples who lived together without marrying don't have the same right to ask for one. Buzz Financial Services explains how pensions are split on divorce.
If you weren't married
Separating without a marriage or civil partnership means family law largely doesn't apply to your money, however long you lived together. There's no automatic right to a share of a partner's pension, savings or income. If the home is only in one person's name, proving you have a stake in it usually depends on what you paid towards it and whether there was any agreement, written or clearly understood, that you'd share its value — a claim under a trust of land, which is a different and often harder process than divorce. If you have children together, a separate claim for their maintenance and housing needs can be made regardless of whether you married. Look early for a solicitor who specialises in cohabitation disputes.
Your own money from now on
- Open a current account in your own name, if you don't have one, and move your pay into it.
- Work out what you will spend living alone. The survival budget calculator helps.
- Check your credit report. A joint account links your credit files. Once it is closed, you can ask each credit reference agency to add a “notice of disassociation” to remove the link.
- Change passwords and PINs your former partner knows.
- Update your will and the people named on your pensions and life policies — marriage and divorce both change how a will is read in law. See wills and financial admin for what else needs changing.
If one partner controlled the money
Controlling a partner's access to money is economic abuse, and it is named specifically in the Domestic Abuse Act 2021. It includes stopping someone working, taking their wages or benefits, running up debt in their name, or restricting access to bank accounts or cash. The National Domestic Abuse Helpline is 0808 2000 247, free and open 24 hours. Many banks also have a specialist team for customers affected by economic abuse — ask yours before you close any joint accounts, so money isn't frozen at the point you need it most.
This week
- Start the asset list above, even in draft form, while records are easy to find.
- Request CETVs for every pension now — they take weeks, and nothing else can be agreed properly without them.
- Run a survival budget so you know the number you need, not a guess, before any negotiation starts.
Sources: GOV.UK (money and property when you divorce, State Pension and divorce); Family Law (Scotland) Act 1985; Domestic Abuse Act 2021. Figures checked 16 October 2026.